The FA Cup THIRD ROUND DRAW!

Today saw the football world grind to a standstill as today the draw for the 3rd Round of The World Famous FA Cup was made at Wembley stadium, today. The halls of Wembley were widened especially to accommodate the swagger of Oasis' Noel Gallagher and Kasabian's Serge Pizzorno who pulled some balls out of a bag to give us some TOP TIES!



THE SOCCER WORLD WAS SHOCKED as Pizzaro and Gallagher proceeded to draw their individual teams against each other, setting up a super soccer action tie between Leicester Foxes and Manchester Citizens. Serge said: "I didn't even mean that or not nothing or anything!"

The full draw looks like this guys:

BURNLEY CLARETS V THE PORT VALIANTS

COVENTRY SKY BLUES TAKE ON THE PALACE EAGLES

THE BRISTOL ROBINS WILL PLAY MIDWEEK SHEFFIELD

THE FULHAM COTTAGERS TO FACE PETERBOROUGH'S POSH

DONNY ROVERS TO PLAY THE WANDERING WOLVES

BRIGHTON SEAGULLS OR FC UNITED WILL PLAY THE POMPEYS OF PORTSMOUTH

HUDDERSFIELD TERRIERS WILL PLAY THE WHITES OF DOVER

THE RED DEVILS OF CRAWLEY OR SWINDON ROBINS COULD FACE SAVAGE'S RAMS

THE WEST HAM HAMMERS WILL FACE BARNSLEY TYKES

READING READERS TO FACE THE WEST BROMWICH BAGGIES

THE LONDON GUNNERS TO FACE DIRTY WHITES OF LEEDS

THE BLADES OF SHEFFIELD WILL TAKE ON THE VILLAINS OF ASTON

LEICESTER FOXES AT HOME TO MANCHESTER CITIZENS

BOLTON TROTTERS WILL PLAY THE YORK YORKIES

THE ROVERS OF BLACKBURN AGAINST THE QUEEN'S PARK RANGERS

THE SWANS OF WALES TO FACE THE COLCHESTER U'S

THE WYCOMBE CHAIRBOYS TO FACE HEREFORD BULLS OR THE LINCOLN IMPS

THE BORO OF STEVENAGE WILL FACE TYNESIDE MAGPIES

THE BURTON BREWERS WILL FACE THE BORO SMOGGIES

MILWALL LIONS TO FACE BIRMINGHAM BLUES

THE SOUTHAMPTON SAINTS TO PLAY BLACKPOOL TANGERINES

THE HORNETS OF WATFORD AGAINST THE MONKEY HANGER'S OF HARTLEPOOL OR YEOVIL GLOVERS

THE LONDON PENSIONERS VS THE SUFFOLK TRACTOR BOYS

WEARSIDE BLACK CATS WILL PLAY NOTTINGHAM MAGPIES OR THE CHERRIES OF BOURNEMOUTH

SCUNTHORPE IRONS WILL PLAY THE TOFFEES OF EVERTON


HAND OF BLOG'S SUPER SOCER PICK

MANCHESTER RED DEVILS TO PLAY LIVERPOOL REDS

THE TIGERS OF HULL VS WIGAN LATICS

THE POTTERS OF STOKE AGAINST THE WELSH BLUEBIRDS

LONDON SPURS AGAINST THE ADDICKS OF CHARLTON OR LUTON HATTERS

PRESTON NORTH END V NOTTINGHAM'S TRICKY TREES

NORFOLK CANARIES TO FACE THE BLOOD OF DROYLSDON OR PROFESSOR LEYTON'S Os

TORQUAY GULLS TO PLAY THE CUMBRIAN BLUE ARMY

And that concludes the draw. All ties will probably be played sometime in January. Now, let's all have a ruddy CUP FOOTBALL TIME OF IT!

PSYCHIC ANIMALS!

Now Paul The Psychic Octopus is dead, we've spotted a gap in the football predicting pets market. I now present to you... MILO THE PSYCHIC CAT




MILO SAYS... WEST HAM WIN!

SUNDERLAND BLACK CATS V MANCHESTER CITIZENS

Dearly beloved. Ladies and gentlemen. Boys and girls. We are gathered here today to celebrate SOME SUPER SOCCER ACTION! SUNDERLAND BLACK CATS V MANCHESTER CITIZENS. WHAT A MATCH UP! This game marks both sides THIRD Premier League tie this season. The Citizens high from a 3-0 victory over LIVERPOOL REDS, while Sunderland nursing their losing sores after chalking up a zero one defeat to newly promoted West Bromwich Baggies. An hour before kick off and the teams are in, both sides once again playing it safe with eleven men each.

Excitement builds. The game begins. Football at it's most football. A sluggish start from both sides, with the home side just edging the game in the opening stages. HOWEVER, by the fifteen minute mark the game had opened up to the footballing gods, and it was the CITIZENS making lemonade. A Sunderland corner was cleared to the edge of the area, Kieran Richardson's long range effort SMASHES Yaya Toure. Toure picks up the ball and carries it quickly across the length of the play area. He has the run, he beats his man, he cleverly slides the ball across the area, the BLACK CATS GOALKEEP on his knees, praying for the miss. The ball arrives at the feet of CITIZENS man Tevez, and yes! yes!

NO! THE CHANCE IS PASSED UP! Tevez misses the GOLDEN OPEN NET STRIKE! He won't be doing that again anytime soon. That miss however sparked a spell of footballing masterclass from the Manchester men. Some nice interchange football between Yaya Toure and Tevez almost put the Argentinia striker in on the half hour mark but he was thwarted by the Sunderland goaltender Mignolet. Manchester playing WATER football. Sunderland making a pasty out of it. Chance followed by chance came from the Citizen's but no goal could be converted.



At this point the referee blows for half time. Both sides have done some good football but this match up remains a NO SCORE ZONE. Fifteen minutes later the teams returned and the second half was about to get underway. BUT WAIT! Sunderland's Michael Turner and Frazier Campbell, both of whom had received treatment in the first half, were unable to take the field. Campbell had been stretchered off before half time, and Turner limped off. No worries! Two regulation changes will solve that! Danny Welbeck and Phil Bardsley are brought on and the game continues.

As the opening stages of the second 45 minutes were played out, the home side, once again, started the brightest of the two, with new man Welbeck using a nice turn of pace and skill to combine with Malbranque as the BLACK CATS pushed for the opener. Their dominance continued, looking a whole new side in the second period, forcing City further and further out of the game. The midfield combo of Jordan Henderson and Lee Cattermole closed the space in the middle of the park, giving the visitors no sniff of footballing action. The pressure almost paid off as Bent and Welbeck played some good football together to create the chance, which Welbeck blazed over.

The Manchester manager had had enough, Changes were to be made. On came superstar striker Adebayor in place of Lescott. It was a change which almost had an immediate effect on the match score line, as the Citizens win the corner chance. The ball WHIPPED in, the chance hit home by Adebayor from SIX YARDS OUT. A GOAL, SURELY!? BUT WAIT! NO! A SUPER SOCCER STOP from the BLACK CATS GOAL TENDER Mignolet. The ball tipped over! The danger gone! What action!

The game livened up as both sides could sense the winner. It’s end to end. Box to box. Cheek to cheek. I smell a goal in the air. Chance after chance but no goal came. UNTIL!

A Sunderland break! Al Muhamaddi, who had threatened all game, picks up the ball in his own half. He runs with it. He slips passed his man! He’s away! He whips the ball in! Bent is in the box! The chance... the ball passes him by. BUT WAIT! The referee’s whistle! An infringement! Micah Richards pulls down Darren Bent! The referee points to the spot, a PENALTY STRIKE AWARDED! Bent dusts himself down, composes himself and...



YES! IT’S GOOD! SUNDERLAND MAKE THE NET BULGE! Sunderland penalty posted home via first class courtesy of Darren Bent. What a game! The match restarts but there’s no time remaining, the referee blows! FULL TIME!! Black Cats have done it! Sunderland all over City like a bad smelling rash. As for City? Money does not maketh the team.

Sunderland 1-0 Man City
(HT 0-0)

Bent (pen) 90+4

LINE UPS

Sunderland

22 Mignolet
03 Richardson
04 Turner (Bardsley 46)
19 Bramble
29 Ferdinand
06 Cattermole
08 Malbranque
10 Henderson
27 Al-Muhammadi
09 Campbell (Welbeck 46)
11 Bent

Substitutes

24 Carson
02 Bardsley
07 Zenden
16 Riveros
25 Colback
17 Welbeck
26 Waghorn

Man City

25 Hart
02 Richards YC
04 Kompany
19 Lescott (Adebayor 75)
28 Kolo Toure YC
07 Milner
11 A Johnson (Silva 81)
18 Barry
34 De Jong YC
42 Yaya Toure
32 Tevez (Jo 90+1)

Substitutes

01 Given
05 Zabaleta
08 Wright-Phillips
21 Silva
24 Vieira
09 Adebayor
27 Jo

SUNDERLAND BLACK CATS V BIRMINGHAM BLUES

The footballing world’s eyes were firmly focused on Sunderland’s STADIUM OF LIGHT this weekend to see the soccer match up between two of football’s HEAVYWEIGHTS kick off their PREMIER LEAGUE campaigns, THE SUNDERLAND BLACK CATS V THE BIRMINGHAM BLUES. At 2pm the sides were announced, and yes both sides went with the traditional 11 professional footballers each. By 3pm we were ready to get under way and BOY was there excitement. The BLACK CATS wore a fetching red and white shirt, whilst the BLUES were in a smart little blue number.



The game began at the start and the home side looked the brighter of the two, with the man from the left side of defence, Kieran Richardson, steaming forward at any chance and the chap Frazier Campbell looking dashing up front. It was a Frenchman who struck the first chance, as Steed Malbranque shot wide after a Richardson pass. Malbranque had a chance again AND YES! But alas Steed shot wide again.

BUT WAIT! A PENALTY! Conceded by the Birmingham man Stephen Carr after he blocked off Campbell’s run, the referee points to spot. Darren Bent lines up. Darren Bent marks the score sheet! The cats ARE PURRING! Bent almost got the cream for himself moments later but spurned the chance to net the match doubler.



Controversy to follow! THE CAPTAIN’S CURSE! BLACK CATS skipper LEE CATTERMOLE forced to take an early long walk to the shower by referee Taylor after committing two YELLOW CARD OFFENCES. Cattermole off, SUNDERLAND DOWN TO TEN.

And so the referee calls time on a first half which saw ten men Sunderland Black Cats hold a goal lead. 15 minutes later, the teams are returned and the football resumed! ADVANTAGE BLUES? NO! A DISASTROUS moment for Blues back man Stephen Carr whose looping header sails over his goalkeep and into the goalnet. NIGHTMARE FOR BLUES! A fan runs on the pitch! It's going wild!! 2-0 BLACK CATS! A HOME WIN SURELY!? Don’t write football off just yet!



Fifteen minutes left on the match clock, Sunderland centre back Titus Bramble gives away the corner chance. AN EXPLOSIVE GOAL isn’t far away. The corner taken short, the ball whipped in, the cross connects, the header made, the goal scored! SCOTT DANN! 2-1! A game! The BLUES looked more like scoring as they pressed ten men Sunderland with chance after chance. AND SUDDENLY, a cheap free kick conceded, a cross by Larsson, another header, A GOAL! THE MATCH LEVELLER FROM RIDGEWELL! WHAT A GAME! The man in black makes full time a reality. Sunderland Black Cats 2 Birmingham Blues 2. Four goals, a red card and a penalty. What a start!

Sunderland	2-2	Birmingham	FT
(HT 1-0)
Bent (pen) 24 Carr (og) 56		Dann 77 Ridgewell 88

LINE UPS

Sunderland
22 Mignolet
03 Richardson YC
05 John Mensah
15 Onuoha
19 Bramble
06 Cattermole YC, RC
08 Malbranque (Riveros 63)
10 Henderson
27 Al-Muhammadi (Waghorn 90+2)
09 Campbell
11 Bent YC (Welbeck 83)

Substitutes
24 Carson,
02 Bardsley,
14 Da Silva,
07 Zenden,
16 Riveros,
17 Welbeck,
26 Waghorn

Birmingham
26 Foster
02 Carr YC(Gardner 65 YC)
05 Johnson YC
06 Ridgewell
15 Dann
04 Bowyer
07 Larsson
12 Ferguson
18 Fahey (McFadden 46)
10 Jerome
11 O'Connor (Zigic 57)

Substitutes
01 Taylor,
03 Murphy,
21 Parnaby,
08 Gardner,
17 Marcos Madera,
16 McFadden,
19 Zigic


HOW 'BOUT SOME HIGHLIGHTS!

GUEST POST BY MATT ABBOTT : SOME WORDS BY A LEEDS FAN.

MIGHTY WHITES MARCH ON THROUGH EUROPE



LEEDS UNITED's glorious European reign continued with a 4-0 victory over Lincolnshire side Lincoln City in the League Cup First Round last night. Just 9 years and 3 months after facing Valencia in the Champions League semi-final at Elland Road, the Whites are still set for continental domination.



A superb string of goals from Jonny 'Kaka' Howson, Luciano 'Balotelli' Becchio, Lloyd 'Super' Sam and Neil Kilkenny were enough to send Leeds through to the next round. Manager Simon Grayson warns the side to take a cautious approach, however, as they could now face the likes of Shrewsbury Town, Morecambe and long-forgotten Accrington Stanley. This is only a decade since they brushed aside the likes of Barcelona, Real Madrid, AC Milan and Deportivo La Coruna in Europe's greatest club competition.

Leeds United always welcome foreign opposition with open arms

Speaking exclusively to Hand of Blog, United's controversial Chairman Ken Bates had this to say,

"Well, it's only a matter of time before we're up against dirty foreigners again. It's all well and good listing Cardiff and Swansea as European away games, but how long before they speak a different language or eat different foods? As a European giant, we have to be prepared for such encounters."

Since losing popular striker Jermaine Beckford to Everton on a free transfer earlier in the summer, Leeds have enlisted the help of Danish goalkeeper Kasper Schmeichel - whose dad has already won the Champions League - and even Swindon Town striker Billy Paynter. Upon arriving at the club's training ground, Paynter seemed confident.

"Everyone knows how well Beckford did at Leeds. They're big boots to fill, but with a bit of screwed-up newspaper and some faith from the gaffer, I know I can do it."

Beckford, who scored every Leeds goal for the last 4 years, is looking to terrorise English defences in the top flight this season with his deadly touchline warm-ups.



Next on Leeds United's fixture list is former Champions League winners Nottingham Forest at the City Ground. As an indication of the Yorkshire club's ever-increasing stature, the game will be shown live on Sky Sports around the world. Be sure to catch this clash of European titans as they look to emulate Blackpool and sneak up through the Play-Offs at the last minute.

By Matt Abbott

START OF THE FOOTBALL LEAGUE, ROBBIE WILLIAMS & ADAM CLAYTON! OH, WHAT A NIGHT!

You know that song right, from that amazing Bruce Willis movie 'The Last Boyscout', FRIDAY NIGHT'S A GREAT NIGHT FOR FOOTBALL!

What? You don't? THEN GET OFF THIS PAGE! Or at least watch it here.

Well Friday the 6th of August certainly was a GREAT NIGHT FOR FOOTBALL! It was the first football league game of the season in England and what a game it was! It was the NORWICH CANARIES versus the WATFORD HORNETS! The NORWICH CANARIES had a massive 25,000 fan following, and fair play to them because both families behaved themselves. A bout between two might south-eastern GIANTS! The CANARIES were expected to crush the HORNETS into submission...but they failed BIG TIME. The HORNETS got a SHOCK OPENER after a super strike by JOHN EUSTACE in the FOURTEENTH minute, then DOUBLED their lead just 10 minutes later with a goal by DANNY GRAHAM. The CANARIES were sick as PARROTS at this point! Then, seven minutes into the SECOND HALF Norwich struck back with a goal by ANDREW CROFTS! It was looking up for the CANARIES even though they were not playing the beautiful game in a beautiful manner. The HORNETS, however, were playing with all the cut-and-thrust of swashbuckling pirate like the legendary Guybrush Threepwood. DANNY GRAHAM was to strike again 9 minutes before time, seemingly ending the game and all hopes the CANARIES had of salvaging some much needed points. The HORNETS were on top, 3-1 in the last minute...surely all over? WRONG! Up popped MICHEAL NELSON for the CANARIES to make it 3-2! GAME ON? No, the referee calls FULL TIME. ALL OVER!

In other news today(Friday) Stockport County signed Left Back Robbie Williams and Leeds United signed Adam Clayton on loan from Manchester City for 1 month.

Leeds are delighted to have got their hands on Clayton. Manager Simon Grayson has been showing alot of Pride after catching the youngster. It is thought they're hoping to extend the loan until New Years Day. He's hoping Saturday's match against Derby won't be too gruesome as he doesn't want a Sunday Bloody Sunday. He has been looking for first team football at City but he Still Hasn't Found What He's Looking For. A debut win really would be The Sweetest Thing, however a loss could leave him Stuck In a Moment He Can't Get Out Of.

Robbie Williams arrived at Stockport yesterday to mixed receptions, County fans really unsure how they Feel. However, Stockport gaffer Paul Simpson is sure RW will be a Supreme signing for his new-look team. With 6 signings Simpson really is bringing in alot of Bodies. A solid defence is needed this campaign as last season SCFC conceded a Monsoon of goals. County are hoping they have No Regrets over the signing, and if he stays Strong, doesn't Come Undone and gets to grip with the league then hopefully for County He's The One. An experienced head would be good for the young side at Stockport, he can teach alot to the Kids. Inconsistency has been the downfall for Stockport many times, it's usually a case of Win Some Lose Some.

OFFICIAL! The best footballer to look at is...

After a week of tight voting the result is finally in. SO in reverse order here is your top three footballers which is the best to look at...

3) Cesc FABREGAS - Spain





In at number two...

2) THEY'RE ALL UGGOS - Various

Representing they're all uggos is Ian Dowie



STRAIGHT IN AT NUMBER ONE

1) Peter BEARDSLEY - England





CONGRATULATIONS PETER! YOU EARNED IT!

IT'S OFFICIAL. The person who's most good at football is...

That one from Brazil! Here is some videographic evidence to prove it once and for ever and ever










Feel that Super Samba Soccer!

Tune in tomorrow when we reveal which footballer is the best to look at!

PENALTY!

With the help of England's Brave John Terry, we have a quick look at how to take a penalty

This is Spain U19 star Ezequiel Calvente showing us how to strike a 12 yard free ball kick! E'sBJT says: "Wonder strike!"

Look here, it's Cruyff and co from the Dutch squad making a super penalty move goal! E'sBJT says: "Way to score!"

Check THIS guy, Totti makes back kick penalty goal! E'sBJT says: "WOWZERZ!"

How 'bout this chancer lining up for a PENALTY STRIKE!? E'sBJT says: "WOAH INVASION HIT"

And finally, here's Arsenal superstars THIERRY HENRY and ROBERT PIRES demonstrating how not to strike a first team penalty chance! E'sBJT says: "WHAT A MONUMENTAL COCK UP!"

WHAT ABOUT YOU, JOHN!? E'sBJT says: "LOLZ A HIT TEH POST!!"

Hey guys, GUYS! Tell us about your FAVE PENALTY STRIKES...!

MATCH WINNER: NWANKWO KANU

NATION'S FAVOURITE SOAPSTARS BACK BID! ENGLAND REJOICES!!

HOT NEWS! That's right! The biggest names from everyone’s favourite SOAP SHOW have announced their support of England's bid to host the World Cup! The stars were at Keepmoat Stadium in Doncaster to raise money for Hallam FM's Cash for Kids campaign. Nick Pickard, who plays that Tony fella from that place, you know, Tony! TONY!, captained the Hollyoaks team who took on a Hallam FM allstars team, beating them 3-2.

Dreamboat Nick said: "I remember when the European Championship was here, it was great for the whole country as everyone got involved and all the towns were full of football fans from around the world. If we could get the World Cup here that would be fantastic." IT WOULD BE, NICK! IT WOULD BE!



Jay Khan, who played that bloke who was brothers with that other bloke one time or something or other, anyway appaz he’s a life long Sheffield United fan and he said some words as well. LET’S LISTEN: "Sheffield's sports facilities are amazing. There is Ponds Forge and the rest of the Sheffield International Venues. I go to Don Valley Stadium to train in the gym and it's one of the best centres in the country. So Sheffield would be the perfect place to host the World Cup, I'd definitely recommend it." I'LL TAKE YOUR WORD ON THAT!



The dude who plays Jack from The Dog Pub was there too. He played for Sheffield Wednesday 41 years ago. He now lives in Grenoside (dunno where that is like) and proper wants his former club to be successful in hosting World Cup matches. Jimmy, or Jack or whatever he calls himself said: "I first came to Sheffield as a 15-year-old boy to play for Sheffield Wednesday. After going into drama, I was drawn back to Sheffield and have lived here for the last 35 years. Although I was born and raised in Glasgow I regard Sheffield as my home now. I love the city and I've seen it change through the decades."



"I support England when they play and me and my family are really passionate about the game. I get so much enjoyment out of watching football, whether it's Wayne Rooney, David Beckham, or the Hollyoaks boys. I was only a school child in Glasgow during the '66 World Cup but I remember even up there the atmosphere was fantastic having the World Cup so close to home. It would be the most amazing thing if we could get the 2018 World Cup."

HOT DAMN, WE CAN’T FAIL NOW!!

SUPER SCOOP! What STRIKING SENSATION DANNY DICHIO listens to!

Hey guys! Ever wondered what super star Danny Dichio listens to!? I know I have! Let's find out, together!



"I don't really go to music shops that often because I'm a DJ and I get all the good records sent up to me from a record shop in London. I had the Horny song months before it was in the national charts last year." What a lucky man!!

He continues: "I'm in a great position because I get all the new stuff as soon as it comes out and I get a good idea of what's going to be popular. And there are some good tunes coming up!" We can't wait, Danny!

A MONUMENTOUS DAY IN FOOTBALL.

Today truly was a monumentous day in footballing history.

Some people played the game, some people watched, while others simply chose to ignore it. We can split these groups into thirds. One third played, one third watched and one third ignored. Therefore, according to THE LAWS OF MATHEMATICS everyone in the world was directly involved in football.


Proof, if needed, it truly is the greatest game on Earth.

HAND OF BLOG

This is a picture what I(Lee Martin)gone done. It is of Maradona when he gone done a Hand Of God goal. But it was his hand, and he isn't a God so I dunno why. I replaced the ball with the internet cos that's where blogs live. Thank you and enjoy your FOOTBALL.